All By Myself

November 2007

Drumroll please. The moment you have all been waiting for…how will she fare by herself with four kids under 5-years-old? A quick reminder, Zach is nearly three weeks old, Tommy is nearly 1-and-a-half, Sarah is 3-and-a-half and Lydia will be 5 this weekend.

I spent Sunday mostly alone, my first day with nobody around since we came home from the hospital. All four kids and I made it to church, everyone who had teeth had ‘em brushed, everyone who had hair had it brushed, and everyone’s shoes matched. Can’t ask for much more; we were on time for 9:30 church, the ladies helped with the service which was kind of a pageant. Tommy, Zach and I held down the pew. Half way through the service Tommy wanted to run in the aisle, so a nice lady took him to the nursery. Our church is really small, so the nursery is not staffed, but you can watch though the window and listen to the service.

Monday went fairly well, we stayed home all day. For supper I managed to have a meat dish, a vegetable dish, and fruit slices, on the table at the usual time.

Tuesday the ladies had school at 8:45. As they were getting dressed, Tommy decided to finish off Sarah’s dry cereal. Lydia came out with capris on. After explaining that it was 19 degrees outside I finally convinced her to put on long pants, and admonished her not to do everything Sarah told her to do (this is a new thing, as Lydia is usually the boss). I put Zach in the nursery and laid out some clothes then went to get Tommy. I helped him off the chair and asked him to come to his room so he could get dressed. I then went to dress Zach. When Tommy didn’t show up I sent Lydia to see what was going on in the kitchen. She called out that something was wrong with Tommy’s tongue. I finished dressing Zach and went to investigate. Sure enough, Tommy was staggering around with his tongue hanging out. He had spilled the pepper on the table and I could see fingerprints in it. Two plus two equals “pepper is not meant to be served by itself, or on cereal.” He didn’t want to drink water or milk from his sippy so I left him alone to fix his little problem, and he did, somehow.

We were running on schedule and I had three kids buckled in the car. When I went into the house to get the last of my stuff I found out Sarah had taken off her coat and was trying to stuff Sad Baby into her backpack. I hit the roof, she doesn’t have a clue where her library book is, but she wants to take her polar bear to school! On the way into town, I was informed by Sarah that she was “going to live in her pink house, and she was taking Zach with her.” The as yet unbuilt pink house is across the street from Grandma.

We made it to school on time, then I went to run some errands. I put Tommy on his leash (which looks like a puppy backpack) to go into the grocery store, as he had dirty pants. They were cleaning the bathrooms which gave me a chance to check out the dark chocolate selection (lacking) and peruse the wines (well stocked). Once everybody was back in clean undies, I put Tommy in the cart and headed down the aisles. I was looking for a greeting card when out of the corner of my eye I saw Tommy take a nose dive out of the cart. I caught him by his beltloop as he was headed for the floor. That could have been ugly.

I picked up the ladies and fed the baby in the school parking lot. I hope their surveillance camera doesn’t go that far! We then drove to the newspaper office, to place an announcement of Zach’s birth in the local tattler. I parked on the street, as the parking lot is about two blocks from the front door. Keep in mind the weather here.  (The street is one-way through town, if the next part doesn’t make sense) I took all four kids into the office with me, then visited with a friend for a while. When it was time to leave, I put the baby in the driver’s side door and told the others to wait for me. We waited until traffic was safe and then proceeded as a group to the passenger door of the van. I lifted Tommy in and turned around to find Sarah dancing in the middle of Highway 30. Well, you can imagine how that went. She is getting a leash too, a monkey one.

A side note, Zach is the pottyingest kid I know. He has tinkled on me no fewer than six times. I gave him a nice warm bath the other night and he pooped in the towel! Then he tinkled! I have learned that tinkle follows poop fairly shortly, and it is best to wait a few minutes before changing him.

Lists

November 2007

I believe my father is the consummate list maker. He used to keep his list on several pages of a legal pad, and we would take it to town once a week, a big deal for us, since we lived 30 miles away. He had a system that involved an asterisk when he needed to have something along to accomplish a particular item, for example depositing a check. Since the advent of the computer age, I am sure his list is on his laptop. I completed my apprenticeship to him, and now have struck out on my own as far as list making goes.

Since I started staying at home, I bought a white board for the fridge and I use it for all my jottings, it is very handy for when you need to add to the grocery list, or remember a hair appointment. I need to make a list of chores for the kids to complete each day.

My friend Old Hat invited us to make a list of our proudest moments, and since then I have been thinking of the lists I have all over the place. Scatterbrained before having four children, I am now a sieve when it comes to remembering things. Following are lists I actually have around the house and refer to

TV shows I like to watch and what time and day they are on (7 a week all on ABC)

The time pre-school starts and ends, as well as dance classes

Books I have read since November 1 last year (118)

Books I want to read (no number that big yet)

Movies I want to add to my Netflix queue (about 50)

When they have baby story times at the library

Being a visual person, I can make a list and lose it, but remember most of what was on it, for example tonight I got into the grocery store (by myself!) to find that my list was waiting for me in the pickup with four kids, an Australian Shepard dog and a husband who had slipped off to fuel up the pickup. Hmm, well I just now slipped out to retrieve my list from the pickup and laughed thinking of myself riding home with my feet on the cat food, so Jake didn’t have a snack on the way home. I forgot Parmesan cheese and Saran Wrap from a nine item list, and the only thing I bought that wasn’t on the list was…Oreos. I use Saran Wrap maybe once a month or less, and I am sure the cheese can wait too.

Some of my recent thoughts have presented themselves in lists, so here they are.

Things my husband has brought home from work, free

3 huge boxes of lettuce

1 big box of crab legs, enough for several meals

Cauliflower

Jelly Bellies

Raw popcorn, I haven’t purchased popcorn since 1997, and my kids have never seen microwave popcorn

2 cases of canned cat food

Broccoli

1000 pounds of potatoes (not a typo)

Raspberries and Strawberries (nearly free)

Ground corn suitable for livestock feed

Enough coats and hats and shirts to clothe a platoon

Wodka (Russian vodka)

Things I, as a mother of three other children, should have remembered when the fourth one came along…

Don’t buy an outfit that buttons down the back, they are a pain for everyone involved. (In my defense, it is really cute, and has one of those front pockets where you can put both hands in the same pocket, never mind that my one-week-old has yet to find his hands much less his pockets.)

Put nursing pads in the diaper bag.

Make sure to look at the back of your shirt before leaving the house.

Things about my babies that I probably shouldn’t share.

As infants their profiles have all looked like Alfred Hitchcock

I read a book by Jennifer Weiner where she described a newborn baby as looking like a very angry old man. It took my breath away, as I have had the same exact thought

When we get two kid legs in one pants leg while dressing, I tell my kids they are mermaids

I told them our kitty Pumpkin didn’t look both ways before crossing the road and that is why she died.

Mae slept in a dresser drawer at my mother’s house

I call breast milk nummies, for example, “Baby is eating his nummies”

My kids like Mary Poppins a lot better than Sponge Bob

Babies don’t have morning breath

I sung a Kenny Rogers song when they were cranky in the middle of the night, “I know it’s late, I know you’re weary, I know your plans don’t include me, still here we are, both of us lonely, both of us searching for something …..”

The ladies can quote large parts of Old Possum’s Guide to Practical Cats

I made up a parody to the Goldfish jingle about breast milk, don’t remember it now, something about “the food that fights back, breast milk”

Tommy has pink and purple jammies

Tommy’s jowls jiggle when he runs, and he runs like Frankenstein – arms outstretched

When the ladies play dress-up I put Tommy in Lydia’s old Pebbles Halloween costume, and he looks a little like Fred Flintstone

Last year for Christmas, Lydia told Santa she wanted a baby doll. This was because we don’t watch broadcast cartoons, so she had no idea what she “should” be asking for. Thank God for PBS Kids, and the networks’ apparent unwillingness to broadcast decent cartoons on Saturday morn (and Barney tapes)

SUBLIST of TV stations we get with the Prairie Package Plus

ABC

NBC

CBS

PBS

FOX (the plus part)

I also have a list of things I want to blog about.

Baby Zach Has Arrived

November 2007

Baby Zach blessed us with all 9 lbs of his presence at 7:00 am Nov. 8. Was I glad to get him out of me! His hair is kinda orange…it has been several generations since that has happened in our family. Maybe it is blonde and his red skin is reflecting. He is pretty agreeable. We got home Sat night and by the early hours of Sun we had two kids puking. Thank God Dad and Nanny were here to take care of us, as Hubby and I got sick later in the day. After some thought, we decided Sarah brought this plague upon us, as she got sick briefly Tues night, and she was the only one who didn’t get sick, her and Nanny, for whom we are still praying. Poor Tommy is still sick, both ends.

We were bummed because Husb had planned to auction for our church’s fall soup supper and auction Sunday. He hasn’t had the chance to use his skills lately, and was anxious to do this one hour auction, but we didn’t want everyone else to get our cooties.

Back to the hospital. We had our baby in a small town hospital, not the big town one. Out of four kids, this is the only time where I was not the only mother there. They have about 100 or so babies a year, and you get great service, and one of those rooms where you stay there through the whole time, unless you have a C section. The local quilter’s guild sends home a quilt with each new baby, and you get your very own nurse the whole time you are in labor. The big hospital in the big town has flat screen TVs and other amenities they brag about. I guess I would rather pay for good medical care rather than good TV reception in a hospital.

The hour is drawing nigh, and I better put this to bed, incase Zach is planning to pull his “I need 8 things done to me between 9 and 10:00 pm” stunt.  I have tried to upload a photo, but it will have to wait, since I am not having much luck.

Gasp! Reading Banned Books

November 2007

I belonged to a book club last year which kind of disbanded over the summer. In order to resume this fall, as soon as possible, I emailed the list of the 100 most banned books between 1990 and 2000 and suggested that we each select a book that we had not read, to read it and come prepared to discuss why it might have been banned and whether we thought a ban was legitimate. This list had books such as Lord of the Flies, Catcher in the Rye, To Kill a Mockingbird. Judy Bloom’s name came up about six times and Shel Silverstein’s did once. It also had some books which were obviously objectionable. It seemed to me like a list that would make for an interesting book discussion. I figured that many of us had read at least some of these books and would be able to carry on a conversation with those who had recently read them. I sent the list and invite to mother’s group to which I belong, since most of the book club members belonged as well.

One of the mothers who did not participate last year sent me a long, and very politely worded response that we as Christians should not be reading banned books. We should be reading Christian lit. Following is my reply.

Wow, you brought up an interesting slant to the banned book thing. I emailed your letter to my mother who was a grade school and high school librarian. She made a point of reading all the fiction books in our high school, maybe a thousand, she had read 46 of those on the list. Now, she is probably more liberal than you are, but she shed some light on the list, especially the books I had not read. I wanted to get the book club going, and soon, so I found a list of books for people to choose from. I would be pretty surprised to see someone come prepared to debate about any of the books you mentioned.

My only personal comments are these books were not necessarily banned by Christians, Madeline L’Engle wrote fantasy, but it was highly regarded as Christian literature, much like the Lion Witch and Wardrobe series, which closely follows several books of the Bible. Maybe the ACLU had a hand in that one. The Bible is banned in many countries; it is not always the good guys banning books. You are just the first person I had heard of objecting to examining these books more thoroughly, and you encouraged me investigate (the easy way by asking my mom). You can’t look at the list and say you have never read any of these books can you?

This is what my mother wrote to me. It is long, she is a librarian after all, and full of opinions. Please don’t let the length of this scare you.

In the first place, this list of banned books is of books that have been banned by some school libraries, sometimes elementary schools, or junior high schools or high schools. There is no reason a thinking adult should not read them. Not that you’d necessarily want to. I’m not interested in reading Madonna’s Sex book for any reason. Sometimes the books are banned from school libraries because the community doesn’t think they are appropriate–Daddy’s Roommate, for example. The Goosebumps books were wildly popular with the mid-elementary group for a while, and were stupidly inane, but that isn’t why they were banned. Some adults felt they were too scary. Most kids thought they were wonderful. R. L. Stine made a fortune because kids love to be scared. Several of the other books on this list fall into this category. The Schwartz books, for example.

Other books were banned because of the perceived sexual inappropriateness, I think. In the Night Kitchen, What’s Happening to My Body (Night Kitchen–a child dreaming is shown falling through the air and his private parts show–it’s still a great book and in my experience, most kids know they have private parts), Forever, and maybe I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings. (If you haven’t read that one, you should–it’s WONDERFUL)

I think if you check the ALA website, you’ll find a list of these books and a description of why certain schools banned them. A lot of them are available at my High School, and some, like Catcher in the Rye, are on suggested reading lists. That wouldn’t be appropriate for most 7th graders, but high school students should be able to handle reading a book about a teenage boy’s thoughts without going into trauma. Not reading about such things doesn’t keep teenagers from thinking about them.

Another thing I just remembered, a lot of those books were written in the 1970s, and there was a whole different thought of what was appropriate for high school literature. It was a period of high drug use (mostly marijuana) and lots of teen lit approached that topic.

As for How to Eat Fried Worms (recently made into a movie), the Crutcher books (teenage male angst), Summer of my German Soldier (teenage crush on an older man), I wonder why they are on the list and how people made it through the teenage years without some of those same thoughts and problems. Books often help people with solving those problems, or realizing they are not the only persons with those same thoughts.

Another great book is Fallen Angels by Myers. It’s the very best Viet Nam book I’ve ever read, and I always recommended it to boys who HAD to read a book, and they always thought it was great, until one month somebody stole it.

So, basically, the first reason people want to ban books is because they contain sexual ideas. Frankly, I wouldn’t want Howard Stern’s book, Private Parts in my home, either. Or in a school library. It’s just not appropriate. Another reason is because of violence–Fallen Angels, Slaughterhouse Five, Kaffir Boy, for example. But for young men, seniors in high school going to be in Iraq in a few months–those books are very appropriate. And I guess some people question the witchcraft topic–thinking reading a book that uses that device to tell a story could lead a child to think that is a desirable lifestyle, well, I wonder if they are thinking with a child’s mind or an adult’s. Children just don’t think that way.

By the way, anybody who’s spent any time in a high school corridor or gym has heard all the profanity used in those books, knows of the sexual activity that goes on, and drug and alcohol abuse. Reading a book that mentions those things does not cause them, rather the authors try to explain how to appropriately deal with those issues. I’m talking good authors. Madonna, Howard Stern, etc are not included. I’d ban them too.

As I said, usually, sexuality, violence, profanity. In no case, does it include poor writing, insipid ideas or stories, or inaccuracies. Hmmm. Am I missing something? Well, I could go on. I don’t know if this is what you want, but it’s my answer.

Love, Mom

I cut out the part where Mom said that most Christian lit is inane, but only to keep the peace.

She emailed me back and politely said she didn’t agree with certain things that my mother had said, and went into some explanation of why she felt kids should be protected. I understand where she is coming from and respect her decision, while disagreeing to an enormous extent. This is part of the reply I sent, “in my defense, it is difficult to have a book group and read non-controversial books, because there would be little to discuss except whether you liked the book or not. Obviously an ecumenical organization should not be discussing controversial Christian books, because that could easily alienate people of different beliefs.”

This is, by the way, an adult reading group. The ensuing opinions aired through the group has brought about six new members. Following is the list, I have read at least 29 of them.

Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz

Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou

The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain

Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck

Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling

Forever by Judy Blume

Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson

Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor

Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman

My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger

The Giver by Lois Lowry

It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris

Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine

A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck

The Color Purple by Alice Walker

Sex by Madonna

Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel

The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson

A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle

Go Ask Alice by Anonymous

Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers

In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak

The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard

The Witches by Roald Dahl

The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein

Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry

The Goats by Brock Cole

Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane

Blubber by Judy Blume

Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan

Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam

We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier

Final Exit by Derek Humphry

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George

The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison

What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras

To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee

Beloved by Toni Morrison

The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton

The Pigman by Paul Zindel

Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard

Deenie by Judy Blume

Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes

Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden

The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar

Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz

A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley

Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)

Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole

Cujo by Stephen King

James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl

The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell

Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy

Ordinary People by Judith Guest

American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis

What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras

Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume

Crazy Lady by Jane Conly

Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher

Fade by Robert Cormier

Guess What? by Mem Fox

The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende

The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney

Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut

Lord of the Flies by William Golding

Native Son by Richard Wright

Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday

Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen

Jack by A.M. Homes

Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya

Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle

Carrie by Stephen King

Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume

On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer

Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge

Family Secrets by Norma Klein

Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole

The Dead Zone by Stephen King

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain

Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison

Always Running by Luis Rodriguez

Private Parts by Howard Stern

Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford

Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene

Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman

Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett

Running Loose by Chris Crutcher

Sex Education by Jenny Davis

The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene

Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy

How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell

View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts

The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder

The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney

Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

I found some great information, and opinions, on Amazon about certain banned books.

Frank, AnneAnne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl. Modern Library. Challenged in Wise County, Va. (1982) due to “sexually offensive” passages. Four members of the Alabama State Textbook Committee (1983) called for the rejection of this book because it is a “real downer.”

Handford, Martin. Where’s Waldo? Little. Challenged at the Public Libraries of Saginaw, Mich. (1989), Removed from the Springs Public School library in East Hampton, N.Y. (1993) because there is a tiny drawing of a woman lying on the beach wearing a bikini bottom but no top. Yes, but did they find Waldo?

Lee, HarperTo Kill a Mockingbird. Lippincott/Harper; Popular Library. This novel has been challenged quite a lot due to its racial themes. Challenged–and temporarily banned–in Eden Valley, Minn.(1977); Challenged at the Warren, Ind. Township schools (1981), because the book “represents institutionalized racism under the guise of ‘good literature’.” After unsuccessfully banning the novel, three black parents resigned from the township human relations advisory council. Banned from the Lindale, Tex. advanced placement English reading list (1996) because the book “conflicted with the values of the community.”

L’Engle, Madeleine C. A Wrinkle In Time. Dell. Challenged at the Polk City, Fla. Elementary School (1985) by a parent who believed that the story promotes witchcraft, crystal balls, and demons. Challenged in the Anniston Ala. schools (1990). The complainant objected to the book’s listing the name of Jesus Christ together with the names of great artists, philosophers, scientists, and religious leaders when referring to those who defend earth against evil. Got it. Let’s cross Jesus off that list, shall we?

Lewis, C.S. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Macmillan. Challenged in the Howard County, Md. school system (1990) because it depicts “graphic violence, mysticism, and gore.” I’m sure the school system would rather have its children reading something which adheres to “good Christian values.” I cannot recommend the works of C.S. Lewis highly enough. The Narnia books, in particular, are great for readers of all ages

Silverstein, ShelWhere the Sidewalk Ends. Harper. Challenged at the West Allis-West Milwaukee, Wis. school libraries (1986) because the book “suggests drug use, the occult, suicide, death, violence, disrespect for truth, disrespect for legitimate authority, rebellion against parents.” Challenged at the Central Columbia School District in Bloomsburg, Pa. (1993) because a poem titled “Dreadful” talks about how “someone ate the baby.” On the other hand, this book does present the negative consequences of not taking the garbage out.

Snyder, Zilpha KeatleyThe Egypt Game. Dell; Macmillan. This award-winning novel was challenged in the Richardson, Tex. schools (1995) because it shows children in dangerous situations, condones trespassing and lying to parents and ostensibly teaches about the occult. The school board declined to ban this book, but did decide that parents should be notified when it is used in class

Vonnegut, Kurt, JrSlaughterhouse-Five. Dell; Dial. Burned in Drake, N. Dak. (1973). Banned in Rochester Mich. because the novel “contains and makes references to religious matters” and thus fell within the ban of the establishment clause. Challenged at the Owensboro, Ky. high School library (1985) because of “foul language, a reference to ‘Magic Fingers’ attached to the protagonist’s bed to help him sleep, and the sentence: ‘The gun made a ripping sound like the opening of the fly of God Almighty.’ ” Challenged, but retained on the Round Rock, Tex. Independent High School reading list (1996) after a challenge that the book was too violent. This particular novel is the recipient of a very cool plug in the movie, Footloose, starring Kevin Bacon

Wilder, Laura IngallsLittle House in the Big Woods. Buccaneer; Harper; Transaction. Removed from the classrooms, but later reinstated, for third-graders at the Lincoln Unified School District in Stockton, Calif. (1996). Complainants also want the book removed from the library because it “promotes racial epithets and is fueling the fire of racism.”

Wilder, Laura IngallsLittle House on the Prairie. Buccaneer; Harper; Transaction. Challenged at the Lafourche Parish elementary school libraries in Thibodaux, La. (1993) because the book is “offensive to Indians.” Banned in the Sturgis, S. Dak. elementary school classrooms (1993) due to statements considered derogatory to Native Americans. It always amazes me how people would rather ignore or revile literature from a past era, rather than use it to teach acceptance and tolerance. Obviously the characters depicted in the novel do not have “politically correct” 21st century viewpoints. Why not use the opportunity to discuss how things have (hopefully) changed?

“Each book has its own gifts to offer, but the freedom to choose which to read teaches some of life’s most important lessons — trusting yourself, knowing what you believe in, tolerance — all of which are more difficult to learn once you get beyond childhood.”

In conclusion, I recently read Red Sky at Morning by Richard Bradford, a book I first read at about age 12, and several times since. Each time I read it I fall off the bed laughing. I did some serious thinking about it, and it should be banned for the following reasons, and the reasons are so numerous it probably should be banned nationwide. (please detect the sarcasm here) It has confusing racial references, vulgar language, references to body fluids, violence, disrespect for authority, death of animals and people, alcohol abuse and underage drinking, sex discussions, nudity, and a dirty reference to a bishop and a bunch of nuns. It also has some Spanish in it and is anti-family. It really is a perfect book!

Halloween

October 2007

Here we have Sarah as the ballerina in too tight shoes, Tommy as Bob the Builder and Lydia as Laura Ingalls.  Thanks to hand me down dress up clothes, last year’s dance recital and a mother who won’t throw away good clothes, the cost to me was Zip, zero, nada….Priceless.  My grandmother made me the Laura dress in 1976.  It is a teeny bit long on Lydia.  Tommy’s hat looks like a fireman’s hat, but it says “construction” on it.  Since we live in the country, we just trick or treated our neighbors, and we were probably the only ones most neighbors had.  We still made a haul that will last through Easter.

As kids we usually t-o-ted in town,  near my grandmother’s house.  Occasionally we would stay overnight with a friend from school, and they would t-o-t in our rural neighborhood.  Mae Sakurada was the one who made popcorn balls for each kid she expected (and a few extras) then made up little packets with lots of other goodies as well.   I still remember her fondly.  This year we accidentally found that neighbor here!  I think she only has her granddaughter usually, but we gave her a heads up and each kid came home with a rice crispy cookie with a face on it, and a little packet of goodies.  We will be back next year! 

Riding in Cars With Me

October 2007

In the mid 1980s my brother and I started driving in a 1966 Ford pickup. It was hot -because it didn’t have a/c, although it did have a nifty floor vent thing. Dad had someone paint it, but told him when he had used up the first bucket of paint to stop. It was a medium blue on the outside with a turquoise interior. It had an AM radio good for picking up Denver stations and not much else. The speedometer did not work, so you had to kinda estimate on the fly. I don’t think anyone ever got a ticket, but that V8 would go plenty fast. After driving fast, when we parked, it would backfire, to let everyone else know we had arrived.

When we were younger, as in 10 or so, my brother and I helped the hired man completely overhaul the engine. At the time I could have told you nearly anything about how the engine worked. Since I didn’t keep up in that field though, now I can identify only what is necessary. That was when the average person could overhaul an engine. The worst thing about the pickup was the brakes, you had to pump them furiously to get any action. This probably contributed to its final demise. I wrecked it, flipped it actually, on a gravel road while trying to stop. I wouldn’t recommend that for anyone else. I think the steel in the body probably saved us. We didn’t even have a scratch.

We then graduated to my great grandmother’s 1967 Buick Electra. Now that was a car. Too bad we didn’t have a drive-in theater anywhere near, as you could fit a dozen people in the trunk comfortably. It had 6 cigarette lighters, I believe, one for each passenger. My poor kids will never learn the pleasure of scarring each other by playing with a hot cigarette lighter while on family vacations. One time I parked it in town overnight and the next morning I found a length of garden hose sticking out of the license plate (where the gas tank was). Some poor sod didn’t realize that even though the tank would hold probably 35 gallons of gas, (what was needed to drive 250 miles) I could only afford to keep 5 gallons in it. My brother ended up wrecking it though and replacement parts were not in the budget.

That was the only automatic transmission I remember driving until I was 28. In fact when I took driver’s ed, I told Mr. D. that I had never driven an automatic. This turned out to be a good strategy as I immediately grabbed his left knee which he had sprawled exactly where the stick shift was supposed to be, and slammed on the brake with my left foot. The brake on an automatic transmission is larger than on a standard, and it sticks over where the clutch should be. I repeated this several times and still managed to pass the class. The teacher got better about his manspreading after a while. Mr. D. did teach me to parallel park like a professional, and that lesson has served me quite well.

When I got married in 1997 my dowry included a plain 1994 pickup. My husband had a fancy 1997 pickup. We still have the 94, although it has several cow shaped dents as it is now the fencing pickup. We traded the 97 for a car, coincidentally just before the engine blew. I doubt it could have withstood the kind of use the old red pickup gets.

For a while we had a really sexy pickup last year, with chrome everywhere, it was the old, pretty style of Ford, like 92. It had a chrome bumper, mud flaps, running boards, bed rails, everything but naked ladies on the mud flaps. It also had a 6 CD changer and really fancy radio. Some of this should have clued us in as to the previous owner, and his probable driving habits. That pickup caused us no end of headaches, as well as a multitude minor repair bills. It had brake problems as well as some acceleration issues. At the end, my husband went to put it into reverse and the shifter pretty much fell off in his hand. He added a size 8 dent to the front fender then traded it in on a newer, plainer model, still under warranty. I wish we had at least swiped the tailgate off of it, I bet it would fit on old red.

My Reading Habit

October 2007

I went to the Dr. today and found out that the baby is a boy.  After four pregnancies, I finally found out.  It was pretty darn obvious, although I did confirm my suspicions with the ultrasound lady, “Is that what I think it is?”  It was.  So, a boy for Leo to beat up.  Good.  We will probably call him Zachary or Zach.  My husband made the mistake of telling his mother this info and she suggested Wayne.  She has not liked any name that we have chosen.  She got to name 11 children, and that is enough for anyone.  She has a questionable neighbor named Wayne, I would never hear the end of it from hubby’s 10 siblings.  Baby happens to be breech as well.  Great, I get it out of me earlier than scheduled!  We are looking at the first week of  November.  Can’t wait to see how much fun a C-Section is.  Maybe the kid will flip around like he is supposed to and it won’t matter.

My Reading Habit

I come from a long line of readers. My mom was a high school librarian. She decided at one point in her career that she would read each and every hard cover fiction book in her library. I don’t know how long it took her, but she read several hundred, maybe thousand, books to accomplish this. She admits to skipping some of Isaac Asimov’s, since she had so many in the library, but she got through the rest of them.

I started keeping a book diary last November. I found that I read about 10 books a month. In the nearly 12 months since I started keeping track, that makes 116 books. October is not yet done, but I am reading a Uris book which promises to take me into November. That seems like a lot, but I have to admit that many of them are teen books, not particularly long, but not necessarily children’s books either. I have managed to read Roots, Angle of Repose and the last three Harry Potter books, including VI and VII each twice since I have been keeping track, and I don’t believe any month has been fewer than nine books. I read too much. It is a great escape though, and pretty cheap too, considering the library is so close, and free if I keep myself organized. It gets kinda lonesome being a stay at home mom in the country, and having a husband who works at a job all day long and his cow business from the time he gets home from his day job until dark or later.

We added an office onto our house a few years ago. The contractor made me a built-in desk with a bookcase over it. As he installed it, he commented, “nobody has that many books!” Was he ever wrong, and I don’t even have very many books, comparatively speaking. I cleaned up my office the other day and found a stash of dusty magazines I had not read. They were only from the last couple of years and so I am tackling them now. I get Smithsonian, and a person just has to read those, they are too interesting to pass up. The other ones I had stashed away were mostly NebraskaLife, some of those are better than others, but I like to page through them at least, to see if I know anyone, and sure enough I usually do. I try to take magazines on trips, so I can read them to my husband as he drives.

I went to a garage sale today that was only books. There were upwards of 60 boxes of books, the kind the moving companies call “book boxes”. The man was a minister so many were on counseling, religion and just plain old Bibles. The rest of them ranged from classics, like Plutarch’s Lives or what ever that was, to Judith Krantz. Some of it made me raise an eyebrow, but I guess a minister has a right to relaxation just like the rest of us. Apparently they were only getting rid of part of the collection. Wow, my mother doesn’t even have that many books. My dad might. I managed to walk out with 10 books, including Raggedy Ann. I will have to find a spot to put them as all of my book cases are full.

I checked out the list of top 100 books challenged from 1990-2000. http://www.ala.org/Template.cfm?Section=bbwlinks&Template=/ContentManagement/ContentDisplay.cfm&ContentID=85714 (I don’t know how to make it look fancy and short, but that is where this takes you.) I had read 29, and maybe three or four more, I don’t remember for sure. Mom had read 46. It makes me feel like an underachiever. She said she was off to the library with the list. I wonder if she will learn anything about how her body is changing…

The Incident of the Underwire

October 2007

After my third and final child, I figured my body was done changing shape and I had come to an angle of repose, as Stegner would say. Grandma asked what I needed for Christmas, and I was honest and said a bra. She gave me a gift certificate to JC Penney.

In January I took all three kids to JC Penney to go bra shopping. Tommy was in a stroller, as he was 7 months old, and the ladies were along for the ride, at 4 and nearly 3 years of age. JC Penney is apparently saving money on labor, as nobody works in the store except the check out clerk, from whom I borrowed a tape measure. I found a couple bras that I thought might come close, so we went to the fitting rooms. The handicap access one was locked. It was the only one with a door, so I chose the curtained room farthest from the changing area entrance. Then I was faced with a choice. I could close the curtain and leave Tommy outside in the hallway, or I could put the stroller in the changing room and change in the hallway, with a view of the entire store, or rather the entire store would have a view of me. My third alternative was leaving the curtain open and the stroller in the hallway. I tried this, but the ladies were being “active” and I had a hard time keeping an eye on them without chasing them down the hall while hooking a bra behind my back. I am somewhat modest, and although the store was pretty empty, it seemed a little risqué.

I finally gave up in disgust and bought my husband some long johns with the gift card. I told the cashier, when she asked if I had found everything I needed, that I had not found anyone to help me in the bra department. She said she was sorry but she had to stay at the cashier’s counter.

We proceeded down the mall to Victoria’s Secret. The lady put all four of us (and the stroller) in a changing room that was larger than a standard bedroom, with a locking door and everything. She measured me and found me some bras to try. She even gracefully side-stepped my question about the weird under-arm fat bulges which showed up in one particular style I had tried. I bought two bras, which cost more than the gift certificate had been by quite a bit, but the service and privacy were worth it.

I had quit nursing Tommy four or five weeks before bra shopping, thinking that things would be back to normal. About two weeks after the incident, I noticed it looked like I had a couple of golf balls rolling around in my new bras. Have I shrunk more? I don’t have a lot to lose in the first place!

I don’t know of course, since I am pregnant again. For some reason Sears was the only place to buy nursing bras in our town, and they quit carrying their maternity line. Actually nearly every store quit selling maternity clothes between Jane and Leo. You would think the third largest town in Nebraska would have enough customers to keep a maternity shop in business, or at least a place to buy something between WalMart (where I don’t shop) and Yonkers (which I can’t afford). Last week I bought two nursing bras through the JC Penney catalog (it was private, and of course they don’t carry any at the store). The catalog said buy your pre-pregnancy size. Can’t wait to see how that works out. It just doesn’t seem right. My old nursing bras are shot, and they never fit well in the first place. I would have asked about nursing bras at Victoria’s Secret, but I had asked during my first pregnancy and found out that breastfeeding was not her secret.

I am not actually reading the book, but it looks good.  Will have to check out the library.

September Thoughts

October 2007

This must be a good year for toads. We have them all over the place, and the darn things eat mosquitoes, so I hate to step on them, but it is hard to avoid. They are quarter sized on up to prince-kissing size (maybe that was a frog). We probably have nearly one per square foot of lawn, well maybe less than that, but they are everywhere. Maybe we are low on garter snakes…Dad always said the coyote and rabbit populations were dependant on each other. I haven’t seen many snakes this year, but not because I was looking for them either.

I am ashamed to admit it, but we have had 17 extra inches of rain this year, timed pretty well. Our annual rainfall is around 22 or so. I feel bad for the people at the other end of the state with 5 inches so far this year, about half of what their average is. We did not water our lawn this year, until last weekend, and then just a few dry spots under the trees. The rest of it looks pretty healthy, but we aren’t expecting a Golden Spade Award any time soon.

It is a good thing we live in the country, otherwise our neighbors would be calling the city on us for not maintaining our property and causing adjacent property values to decline. We let our lawn get way too tall sometimes, then I have my homemade automatic mulcher, which involves a tarp strap holding the grass shooter up so the grass scatters. When the lawn gets too tall this leaves attractive windrows of dead grass in the lawn. I let it cure for a day or so then mow again, scattering the dry grass further. I have learned that if I don’t fertilize my lawn, I don’t have to mow it as often, same goes with watering. Our garden can become an eye-sore being right along the road and full of 6 foot weeds.

Somewhere in Nebraska there is a line, on the west side of the line, rural people just have a yard that looks ok, not especially nice. East of that line (where we live) rural people haven’t got the memo that they live in the country and they keep their lawns up like town folk do, but probably using stronger chemicals, available only to farmers. Our neighbors water their lawn pretty much every day, and mow it probably twice a week. Sounds like a waste of water and fuel to me, but their lawn looks great.

I lived on a farm in Wyoming where my boss actually ran the swather across my lawn a couple times a year, followed by the bailer. It doesn’t take long to mow when you have a 30 foot wide mower. The bales were pretty small though. We have too many trees for that to work here, otherwise I would be tempted…

Right now I am outside, and one-year-old Tommy has the hose. He is learning all about fluid dynamics, and how to spray himself in the mouth. He is having a blast. He is a mower man as well, climbing up on the lawn tractor every chance he gets. I turned my back the other day then when I looked back, all I could see was the soles of two feet disappearing on the far side of the mower. He has some sort of rolling head-first dismount figgered out, because he was not upset in any way and he landed on the concrete. We better keep it parked on the grass I guess.

I looked out on the deck the other day, and there was Ariel the Mermaid sunbathing in the nude. It seems her natural pigmentation would preclude such behavior. When Sarah went out to get her, she wasn’t even burned. Now I am jealous. Most of my ancestors came from England, so I didn’t develop the tanning gene. I don’t do much of anything, unless I burn, so I stay out of the sun. I guess it is probably safer that way. My husband never burns, he just gets darker and darker. Someday we will probably be visiting a dermatologist as a result of this, but he isn’t worried.

Tommy moves so fast these days, the other day he disappeared. He decided to walk around the corner of the house, and down the driveway to greet Daddy returning home from work in his huge pickup. We need to put a little fence thing in that part of the yard. He doesn’t come to his name yet, so if he wanders, you have to go searching. We have asked the county to put a Slow Children sign in front of our house, but they are not in a hurry to do that. Even if people don’t slow down, maybe they will keep an eye out, if only because they think my kids are slow.

Rail Travel at the Turn of the Century

October 2007

This has been a busy week at our house.  Sarah had to have the root of a tooth removed Monday.  Somebody, ahem, put her on the bed when she was 10 months old and of course she fell off and knocked a tooth out.  She only had it for 3 weeks.  Anyway, the Dentist said 2 1/2 years later that the root had to go.  Then the doggone tooth fairy didn’t remember to visit the first night the root was put out.  Whoops. 

Wednesday the husband had nose surgery, hopefully to cure his snoring problem as well as let him shut his mouth without actually dying of asphyxiation.  We shall see.  He has been hanging around the house a lot, it is kinda weird having him around so much, but then he can’t help because he feels so lousy. 

Then of course, I made it to the chiropractor twice.  My lower back hurts and it is all I can do to waddle around chasing Tommy.  Fortunately he prefers to climb, so I don’t have to bend over much.  I have to leave the kiddos in the waiting room while I go back.  So far they have not caused any problems.  Today a lady was waiting on her husband and she read a book to my kids.  Nothing like a small town I say.  I have been having all kinds of shooting pains up and down the back of my thighs.  I am counting the days until this kid gets out of me.  Thirty eight give or take a couple.

Rail travel at the turn of the century

I have taken two train trips in the last year, both starting from central Nebraska and ending in Denver. Amtrak has a ways to go before they make any headway in transportation in the US, and that is too bad.

Good things

1. You don’t have to drive or stay awake

2. The clientele is less spooky than bus travelers, in my limited experience

3. It probably isn’t more expensive for one person than driving with gas at $3.00/gal

4. Lots of leg room

5. Lounge and Dining car to relax in and meet people

6. There is kind of a romance about rail travel

7. You get to see the Denver Stock Yards (and other stuff you might not happen across)

8. The employees are exceptionally nice

9. Old train stations are cool

10. Less pollution than all those people driving, and probably flying as well

11. No waiting in line for security checks

12. You keep your luggage on the same car as you, so it won’t end up lost

Bad things

1. They are so doggone late

2. Only one train goes through a day, so the time may be horrid ie. 2:05 am departure

3. The bathrooms (although they are no worse that those on planes)

4. It is not easy to sleep next to someone you don’t know

I wish people would take advantage of this kind of travel so

1. More trains would run

2. The rail companies which own the tracks would prioritize getting Amtrak though

3. Amtrak could update some of its equipment (I think some of their engines are old)

4. More routes could be added